High On Poker

Allow me to go off topic for a while.

I’m all for the Green movement, particularly when it comes to things such as reducing dependency on oil (moreso because I hate that we, as Americans, basically hand money to enemy nations by buying oil). However, I have realized over time that much of what passes for “Green,” is really just a wolf in sheeps clothing.

Peruse these three real world examples of Green activities by corporations. All are good for the environment, if we are to believe everything put forth by the individual companies/industries. However, there is something else at work that is probably the real reason why these entities would go Green:

Example #1 – Been in a hotel lately? If so, you may notice a sign in the bathroom about linens. Many hotels have decided to Go Green by only washing linens every other day, unless the customer wishes otherwise. This saves the environment by reducing the harmful chemicals used during the cleaning process and reducing water waste and electricity use. All of these things are probably good for the environment, if not so good for your stinky sheets.

Example #2- Ever drink Poland Spring water? If so, you may have noticed the new contoured bottle designed to hold the same liquid using 30% less plastic. I have no idea how this modern marvel came to exist, and I’m sure it bends the laws of physics in some uncomprehendable way. Regardless, the effect is very Green, reducing the amount of natural resources used to make a bottle and in turn reducing the amount of waste/garbage when the drink is drunk.

Example #3- Ever order dinner from SeamlessWeb, a website that amalgamates restaurants to allow you to order delivery from a variety of restaurants in your area, all on one site? If so, you may have seen that some restaurants offer an eco-friendly option where the restuarant does not provide any forks, spoons, knives, napkins, etc. After all, you are getting food delivered to your home, so you are probably going to use your home silverware and discard the store-provided utensils. By allowing you to waive the utensils, the restaurants are decreasing the amount of waste/garbage, while also decreasing the production of plastic utensils, which in turn reduces the use of natural resources and electricity.

Great! What wonderful companies! They obviously love the environment. After all, what company does not love the environment over profits…

The answer is MOST. Most companies do not love the environment more than they love profits. The reality of the situation is that these Green initiatives are really just cost-cutting maneuvers designed to appear like a Green campaign by an altruistic company. Make no mistake, I am sure the altruistic nature of these changes are a big bonus to the companies and are considered when the decisions are made. However, these companies are actually saving money hand-over-fist, all by Going Green. How?

Example #1- The hotels pay for electricity, detergent, water, and labor hours every time they do laundry. By doing laundry every other day, those costs are cut in half! HALF! That may have some benefits to the environment, but it has an even more immediate benefit to the bottom line.

Example #2- By using 30% less plastic in its bottles, Poland Spring is spending 30% less on plastic. Since plastic is recyclable, I querry if this has any significant effect on the environment. One thing I am sure of, though, is that someone got a nice juicy bonus when he/she discovered that Poland Spring could bottle their tap water using 30% less product and get bonus points for calling it Green. In the past, a design change like this would be just that, a design change made to save money and possibly make the bottle distinct for product-recognition purposes. Now, it is Green (money green, no doubt).

Example #3- Restaurants don’t have to supply napkins and forks? Great! Clearly, that means less waste…but it also means less resupplying for the company. It’s another direct cost-cutting maneuver. And frankly, I querry if the wasted water and detergent contaminant from having customers use their own utensils undoes any of the Green aspect of reducing waste. I don’t know either way, but I do know that a company that doesn’t have to supply napkins also doesn’t have to buy as many napkins.

Does anyone else have any other examples?

Let me add, to cut off the snarky posts, that I don’t think these companies or industries are all evil. I just noticed that the term Green is thrown around a lot, and from what I can see, many Green initiatives borne out of the corporate world are really cost-cutting initiatives that can double as “Green.”

Until next time, HighOnPoker will only be available on the Internet. It saves Trees!

I really need to quit playing online poker. I just plain suck at it. There is something about being hidden behind a screenname in an environment with a ton of distractions, mixed with some tendencies to self-destruct, that just makes online poker an uphill battle hardly worth the effort for me. Yet I still return, as it is the methadone to my poker habit.

I actually played the following hand well, but it just goes to show that even the correct play can end up with a poor result. I’m not particularly upset about the hand. I’ve come to learn that this is the epitome of poker. Playing well does not always result in a positive result, even if everything worked according to plan. I include this hand merely because it demonstrates that fact as well as a play I rarely use, giving incorrect odds to your opponent as a means to maximize profit or conversely protect a hand in a tournament.

I’m playing a 15-player $20 MTT field at Bodog. We are down to the final five players and I am the second shortstack with 1220 and blinds of 20/40. There is still a lot of poker to be played at those blind levels. Top 5 spots pay. I’m on the button with T9s.

It fold to me and I raise to 90. The SB is the first shortstack with under 900. The BB is the big stack with 5410. Both call the preflop raise.

By way of commentary, let me note that my small raise of 50 is part of a small ball strategy. I want to see a cheap flop in position. Alternatively, I want to win the hand outright by getting both players to fold. Alternatively, I want to avoid a large re-raise, so I do not want to be too much into my opponents. The SB folds and the BB calls. I’m still in decent shape, as I have position against one opponent and there is no indication that he is particularly strong.

The flop comes down T82, with two hearts. It checks to me and with top pair, I am happy to take down the 200 pot. I bet 170, an odd number that I hope will throw off my opponent. Even a call is okay, since my top pair is probably ahead. I expect little from my opponent. He calls.

The turn is an offsuit 7. It checks to me again. Now I am in trouble. I only have 960 left and the pot is 540. I have a couple of options. I can check, but then I give my opponent a free card and he might be able to scare me off of the best hand depending on the river. I can bet small, but this will likely induce a call and could give proper odds to my opponent if he is drawing to a flush or straight. My final option is to push. This ruins the pot odds for any possible draws by betting almost 2x the pot. With a bet like this, I don’t care what happens. If my opponent folds, I win the significant pot without any further stress. If he calls, I probably am ahead and he is paying way too much for his draw.

My opponent called with Q4h, 12 outs once (9 hearts, 3 Queens). He rivers an Ace of Hearts and I’m busted.

If there was a shortcoming to the play, it was my failure to recognize that the big stack was willing to gamble. I figured betting 960, roughly 20% of his chips preflop (and by the river, closer to 25% of his chips) would be enough to protect my hand and take down the pot. My opponent’s call was bad, but that is part of the game and my play was designed to take advantage of the possibility that my opponent was willing to make a bad play.

Sometimes, poker can be a real bitch. But like sex and pizza, even when it’s bad, it’s good.

Until next time, make mine poker!

I don’t know where people get off telling me that I am entitled and ungreatful merely because I post my opinion on why I, personally, will not play the PokerStars freeroll. I made it abundantly clear twice in the post and twice in the comments that (a) I do not expect anyone to follow my lead, (b) I do not look down on anyone accepting the offer, (c) free stuff is always good, (d) I like PokerStars’ site and software, and (e) I play poker there regularly.

As sometimes happens, people project things onto a post and its author that just aren’t there. This includes comments that state that my position demonstrates a sense of entitlement and being on a high horse. These same people ignore the fact that before they got all upset that I besmirched a bad offer, there were several people who agreed with me.

Plain and simple, I value my time. I am not interested in a freeroll event with poor prizes and a huge amount of players. If you choose to villify me, call me names, and throw around accusations, that reflects more on you than it does me.

As you are entitled to play (without me talking down to you), I am entitled to reject the offer and state so publicly. I am sorry if you disagree and feel that my rejection is a direct insult to you or a sign that I am to be ridiculed.

Until next time, make mine poker!

This is only my two cents, and I do not encourage anyone to follow my lead, nor do I look down upon those who do otherwise. But it needs to be said…

I refuse to play in PokerStars WBCOOP or whatever the hell it is called. Why? Because while PokerStars is a fine site, this is a crap offer. Plain and simple. Allow me to elaborate.

For those who aren’t bloggers, I’ll let you in on one of the not-so-secret-secrets. Blogging can be a gateway to free stuff. Now, I don’t think anyone should ever start a blog with that as your goal because you will be sorely disappointed and eventually quit blogging in about 4 months, tops. But it is one of the little perks. I, for instance, have received more than a few free books and even a free videogame. Then there are the freerolls and money added into tournaments. Bodog runs tournaments twice weekly with hundreds of added dollars per week and fields of less than 50 players. FullTilt gave a ton of prizes away during the BBT series (Battle of the Bloggers), including a seat to the WSOP Main Event worth more than $10,000, as well as a slew of lesser, but still considerably expensive, prizes. The amount of players were no more than a few hundred, if that, over the course of weeks of tournaments. No individual tournament broke the 120 mark, if I’m not mistaken.

PokerStars? All they have offered is a freeroll tournament that over the past few years regularly attracted tens of thousands of players. And each year, the only worthwhile prizes went to maybe the top 10 players. Now, before I go into too much detail, I’ll add that I don’t think an iPod, worth a couple of hundred dollars, qualifies as a significant prize if you have to beat 50,000 over 11 hours. But rather than get bogged down in vague notions of past prizes, lets look at the current prizes offered this year.

At first glance, Stars seems to have made some improvements. Instead of a one-day event with 50,000 players, they arranged for 6 tourneys. Great, right? Wrong. Each tourney is merely a qualifier. Stars isn’t giving you a seat in a big tourney. It’s giving you a freaking satellite to a big tourney. With no apparent limit on how many qualifiers you can play, essentially, you get a chance to play in six 10,000+ person tournaments, all to win a seat into a final tournament, albeit one with a maximum of 432 players (76 from each of the six qualifiers). If you win a qualifier, you can also get a bit of something extra, but the extras suck. Only the top 9 finishers get anything worth over $100, and only one player gets a prize worth more than $500. That’s ridiculous for such a huge field.

Once you make it to the 432 player field, almost one fourth of the field will get something. Unfortunately, out of the 100 paying spots, 55 spots pay a Step 3 ticket, which from what I can tell is worth somewhere around 82$. Whoopee! You don’t break that $500 mark again until the top 10 players. For a $1000 prize, you have to make it to 7th. The top prize though, was $14,300.

Now, for the uninitiated, that’s a free $15,000 prize, but the reality is that it is anything but free. You can only play if you post a couple of links, text and a pic essentially advertising for PokerStars. So, in reality, PokerStars is buying advertising links. PokerStars claims that its prizes total $100,000. Now, most of the prizes are merely freerolls into PokerStars tournaments, which actually costs Stars $0, but ignoring that reality, let’s assume, conservatively, that 25,000 people will play in at least one qualifier event. That boils down to a $4 value per ad. If a site asked me to put up a permanent ad for $4, I’d tell them to go fuck themselves. So, that’s what I’m telling Stars (at least in reference to their offer…I still like the site and software).

On a related note, I recently was contacted by people at LockPoker about shilling for their site. I initially accepted the offer only to reject it afterwards. LockPoker was kind enough to offer $x placed into a Locked Poker account so I can play at their site and report back to you. Then I realized that the amount was way below the minimum check withdrawal of $500. In other words, I would have to double my money several times just to be able to withdraw. The original offer was more than $4 in pure dollar signs, but if I cannot access the money, then it’s not money to me. Granted, I could work the money up to a withdrawable level, but I don’t need the dough badly enough to have to work for it twice, first by putting up a review and second by being forced to play at their site until I win x amount or bust.

Let me be clear: These are all personal decisions, and I do not begrudge anyone who takes advantage of these freebies. Free shit is always good. I just don’t see these things as necessarily free and I don’t have the desire to work my ass off in a poker tournament or grinding at a new site, merely for the chance to win some money. These are just bad offers and when there are sites out there showing proper regard to the poker blogging community, it leaves a huge site like Stars with no excuse for such a transparently absurd promotion.

Good luck to all those taking their chance with Stars or LockPoker. I hope to see that the Poker Blogging community whoops ass and takes down those top prizes. But it ain’t me Stars, it ain’t me you’re looking for.

Until next time, make mine poker!

Here is a fun hand from the Mookie this week. One of the reasons I love blogger tournaments is the history behind the various players. At a regular online tournament, your table mates are unknowns. If you have notes on them, you have basic info on how they play, but you do not have a history to draw upon. I’m talking about knowing what they think of you just as much as knowing their style of play. My opponent’s perception of me has always been a key element of my game, and the blogger games allow me to capitalize on that. Granted, I have not always had the most success, since I don’t play my best online, especially as the evening wears on, but the fact still remains: the element of history between players makes blogger tournaments more interesting to me than a random online tourney.

Now, this hand is all about knowing how others perceive you.

I have 2,220 chips with most players between 2000-3000 at my table and blinds of 15/30. I’m in the BB with 66 when Jamie from WallStreetPoker (2985) raises to 120 from UTG+1. It folds around to me. I decide to call.

The flop comes down a glorious 655, rainbow. Most of the time, I check here, since I have the nuts right now and I wouldn’t mind letting my opponent catch up. However, I know Jamie well from the Wall Street Games, where I have a reputation as a loose player, second only to Matty Ebs. Rather than check the 255 pot, I decided to bet out 180. It’s a small enough bet that Jamie might call light or even re-raise. Keep in mind that to Jamie, I’m just playing this pot to defend my blinds and then probably just took a stab at it out of position to steal the pot. I was kinda hoping Jamie had a big hand, since he is a skilled player and his preflop raise from EP could very well be a decent pocket pair. Whatever the case, even if he has crap, he may be induced to raise me, since I’m known to bet at pots with crap.

To my delight, Jamie raised to 550. With the nuts, a re-raise isn’t the worst play here. Jamie has already demonstrated that he probably has a hand, so a re-raise might be called. However, I’d rather get Jamie to put more money in voluntarily, and the best way to do that in this situation, whether he has great cards or crap, is to just call. I let the clock tick down a bit as though I am being cautious, and then I call the 370.

The turn is a 7 of spades, creating a spade flush draw and a possible straight, both of which would be a blessing, given my full house. I check, laying my trap. Jamie, naturally, can’t help but bet out 850. I only have 1550 left, so it’s a pretty nice bet, given that he was trying to take down the pot from a known loose player. The logic, from his end, is that a bet slightly more than half of my stack will force me to push my entire stack in, essentially. It makes his bet look like a value bet, when it is in fact a bet trying to push me out of the pot. He is toying with my perception with this play. Unfortunately, as I tend to remind myself every so often, there is no use trying to bet a player with a monster hand out of a pot. I again waited and then pushed all-in, requiring Jamie to call 700 into the now 3k pot. He calls and shows…A4o. Yeah. Not much of anything.

The key to success in this hand was utilizing my image. That image went beyond this particular tournament and stretched to all of the sessions Jamie and I have played together. I can only imagine what a name player like Gus Hansen can do with a lagtard image and worldwide recognition of that image.

Seven days until Vegas. At times, the idea of heading out there with a bunch of you fellow degenerates can be a bit much. Then I remember that I’ll be playing poker and everything is right in the world.

Until next time, make mine poker!

First off, I need to injure myself more often. The last post about my potential concussion got way more interest than the hand analysis post just before it. So, from now on, I am committing myself to injuring myself at least once per week. I’ll take suggestions on which body part to injure next…and for the record, I’m saving my junk* for the big New Year’s Diagnose Jordan Spectacular, so you can save all of those requests.

Even with my would-be concussion, I decided that I ought to play some live poker last night. Jamie had arranged a two-table tournament ($35 buy-in) at the Wall Street Game and after a seat openned up, I hopped on the opportunity.

I strolled home from work at about 7pm. The game was scheduled to kick off at 7:15, and it was a mere 5 minutes away, but I still had to change and take come of some things around the apartment, so I texted Jamie to blind me off, as needed.

My head was still not 100% yesterday evening. The back of my skull had a developing bump, albeit a lot smaller (and more painful) than the type of bump you get on the top of your head. I guess because it was at the base of my skull at my neck, the injury affected my neck as well. Even right now, I feel a tightness in my shoulders and upper back that can only be explained by the sudden impact from two nights ago. Last night, though, I also felt a cloudy head. I felt waves of delirium and my ability to focus was weak. I don’t mean that things seemed blurry. Everything was visibly acute, but I just couldn’t concentrate on things, seemingly.

When I arrived at the game, I took my seat at Jamie’s newer, nicer table. I set up my dinner, a turkey sandwich from a local deli, on a nearby stool and sat down to play some poker. The table was mostly familiar faces. Cheryl was on my immediate right, which is a pleasure, as I tend to have trouble dealing with her unreadable play. I announced to the table that I was probably playing concussed, to jokingly warn them about my upcoming terrible play. In reality, I was having trouble concentrating, but I still wasn’t sure if it was all psychosematic.

I started out tight, due in large part to my lack of cards. Eventually, I was moved to the other table, and when I headed over, I had chipped up slightly thanks to my aggressive play. There were at least two hands at that first table where I made light calls preflop and then took the pot with a simple river bet after confirming that no one wanted a part of the hand. In one particular hand, I had some crap cards and we saw a KQT flop. I don’t remember what I had, but I checked, the guy on my left checked and the player with position bet. I decided to float a bet to see if I could take it away late. Surprisingly, the other checker, who didn’t look confident in the hand or at a poker table generally, called as well. I figured I was done with the hand, so I checked the turn, as did the other checker. Amazingly, the flop bettor checked as well, indicating that his BS flop position bet was just that, BS. The river was a Jack, creating a four card straight for anyone with a 9 or Ace. I considered just checking again, but I decided to bet out instead, about 1000 into the several thousand dollar pot. Fold, fold. It was a gutsy play on my part, but I was pretty much betting that neither player had an Ace or Nine. If they had it, so be it. I liked the odds that they didn’t though, mostly based on their seeming disinterest in the hand, particularly after the river. I won another hand in a similar way and yet another hand by calling light out of position after I limped with J8h, flopping a J66 board, getting called on my flop bet, checking the turn, and betting the Jack river. Easy moneys.

So, after all of this, I’m moved to the other table with a slightly above average chip stack. Immediately, I announce my concussed state, once again as a joking precautionary word to my adversaries.

After looking around the table, it was pretty clear that this table was slightly softer. It wasn’t that the players were bad or inexperienced. I just think that they were better suited to my style of game. There were a couple of guys who knew how to fold, and once I established that, I started to loosen up my play. Of course, before that happened, I showed a flopped set after my preflop raise with 66 was called in a few spots but my post-flop bet was folded to around the table. The guy to my left, Ben, said offhand that I could take down the pot with my continuation bluff, so I showed my hands and chastised him jokingly about manipulating me to show. I knew what I was doing the whole time, getting in some advertising for when the blinds would go up. I took down another hand on the flop with a continuation bet after raising preflop with the hammer. I showed that too, but by then, I was actually hoping to induce more action. Showing cards is rarely a good idea…unless you have a goal in mind. This is another reocurring theme at High on Poker: “Controlling the flow of information can be more effective than creating an absence of information if you know what you are doing.” I need to work on that saying a tad.

We ended up down to the final table of 11 after I busted Ben. I had a crappy hand, but pot odds to call preflop after he pushed on top of my steal bet. He showed AK and I had Q5 or maybe J5. I hit one of my cards and that was all she wrote. Meanwhile, I was the table chip leader and close to the tourney chip leader. I also had a lucky image, literally an image that I was merely getting lucky. Ben complained about his lack of cards, or the fact that he got no action on his big cards. I responded, “I’ve been doing so poorly in these games, I guess I’m just due for some good luck.” I hoped that everyone heard that one. A lucky player is scarier than a skilled one in a tournament (maybe not so much in a cash game, though).

At the final table, I was reunited with the players I left behind during my table change. I took the 6 seat, and a player in the 9 seat or 10 seat, Vitaly, looked like the second chip leader, after me. I was watching Vitaly earlier, and it was clear that he was playing solid poker. He was from the Ukraine, and those former Soviets don’t mind gambling. I reckon it probably is related to my own love of gambling, since I have Eastern European and Russian roots. Whatever the case, I could tell in a pretty short time that he was my major competition.

I went from big stack to HUGE stack with one monster hand. Roger was the first to act and raised the 400 big blind to 1200. I had noticed that Roger was a bit of a calling station, correctly calling down a player with Ace-high, Ten kicker, earlier in the night. He had played at the WSG before, and this was nothing new. His raise from UTG threw me off for a bit, and it took me a while to decide what to do as I looked at my QQ. A re-raise could be in order, but I had the suspicion that Roger could’ve been ahead with KK or AA. In any event, I decided to just flat call, since I didn’t see him making too many preflop raises and I wanted to see how the hand developed before I gave away too many chips. To my surprise, Jamie, on the button, decided to push all-in for his remaining 1,500. To make matters worse, another player, I think Dave, called from one of the blinds. Roger called and I confirmed that I could not re-raise because the all-in raise was less than a complete bet. Once confirmed, I announced, “Good, because I was just asking hypothetically. I didn’t really want to raise anyway,” an absurd lie that I didn’t think anyone would take seriously.

The flop came down T-high. I think there may’ve been two diamonds. If memory serves correct, Roger bet out 1600 or so and I called. Dave then pushed all-in over the top for less than a complete raise, and after Roger called, I double-checked again that I couldn’t re-raise. I thought the rule was that the all-in push had to be at least half of a full bet to re-raise and there was definitely a raise of more than 1/2 of a complete bet, but Jamie once again said that no re-raises were allowed and I once again said, “Good, because I still don’t want to raise.”

The turn was a Queen. If there weren’t already two diamonds out, the Queen brought the second one. If there were already two diamonds, the Queen was not a diamond. Whatever the case, I hit my unlikely set. I think it checked to me and I bet out 3000 or so. It was only me and Roger still with chips in the hand, so I was trying to build a second side pot. If he folded, though, I would be happy. The pot was main and first side pot were big enough. He called.

The river was a Ten of diamonds, filling the diamond flush and giving me a full house. Truth be told, I didn’t even notice the flush. I guess the Queen of diamonds actually did come on the turn, because if a flush draw flopped, I think I would’ve noticed it. But as it were, it wasn’t even on my radar. I think it checked to me and I pushed all-in. Roger called. He showed KJd for the second nut flush. I showed my full house. Everyone else mucked. Jamie later admitted to having 55, but given his tiny stack, his play made perfect sense, even if he was drawing dead in no time.

With a huge stack, I sat back for a bit until blinds got higher and I started stealing. I noticed that Vitaly was continually playing well. In light conversation, I figured out that he was friends or at least acquaintances with November Nine player Ylon Schwartz. Wendy had met Vitaly (and Ylon, incidentally) in Vegas randomly. Vitaly had seen her and recognized her from NY or AC poker rooms. They got to chatting and a friendship was formed. I joked that it was pretty obvious that they met at a poker table…everyone at the game met Wendy at a poker table. That girl loves her poker.

Since Vitaly knew Ylon and was playing well, I had to assume that he was no shlub himself. His stack was continually growing as he continued an aggressive game. I identified him as by biggest competition at the table. The other players had lesser stacks. We were down to five, the bubble, and aside from Vitaly and me, the other three players were looking pretty short. To my immediate left was John, who admitted that he was playing poorly even though he made it so deep. He seemed uncertain about his game, which was all the encouragement I needed. To John’s left was Vitaly. To his left was Paul-in-the-Hamily. I’ve played with Paul enough to get a feel for his game, and while he is no softie, his short stack made him less threatening. To his left was Drew, who I had played with once before. Last time, he was complaining about being card dead and played very tight. This time, he seemed to be mixing it up a bit more, but he also had a defeated aire about him. I was to his left, making the circle complete.

Wendy was dealing, but wanted to hit the gym. I lent her my iPod, and as she left (while I was still massive chip leader) she said something akin to, “Don’t bust out 5th…I want to use your iPod.” Fucking jinx!**

And then, well, I gifted most of my stack. Here’s how it went down.

I was in the BB, and Vitaly raised preflop. I called with a couple of napkins (rags, whatever you want to call crappy cards). The flop was T36 or so, rainbow, and I checked. Vitaly bet, and I check-raised. I hadn’t been doing it a lot and I wanted to force him out of the pot. The way I saw it, he was raising preflop a lot and probably just wanted the blinds. After the flop, he might think I’m playing any two cards and luckily hit, thus explaining my check-raise. I figured he would give it up unless he had a really good hand like an over pair. But he called. The turn was a blank, so I bet out again, probably 4500 or so, about a third of his remaining stack. He agonized and called again. The river was an Ace and I got concerned. It wasn’t beyond him to be playing AQ or AK, so that Ace really could’ve been a problem. By the same token, I thought that if he had a hand like KK-JJ, that Ace may be enough to get him to finally fold. I asked for a count and he had 8900 left. I took my time but eventually pushed. I had him covered by more than 10k, which was no small feat, considering starting stacks were 3.5k. He took his time and I tried to play it cool. I didn’t want to go into complete lockdown mode, since that in and of itself is a tell. I just tried to act casual and slightly impatient, as one would no matter what cards he held in this situation. Finally, he called and I announced, “Good call.” He showed AT and it became clear I was not going to shake him off of his hand. FUCK!, I thought inwardly. I knew I had hung myself, but there was a specific reason why I played this hand so hard. I saw Vitaly as my only real competition at this point, and I felt that getting him down to a more reasonable stack (like 8,900) would essentially allow me to run away with the tourney. As it were, instead, I fucked myself and found that I was damn near push or fold poker.

Drew busted in 5th on the bubble a little while later. He pushed with QJ and I called with KJ. We both ended up with three Jacks, so he would’ve been all-in eventually anyway, if that were any consolation. At five people, Pauly had suggested a chop: everyone gets $100 and I get the rest, $260. I was okay with it, since I was still the huge stack and $260 was almost first place money ($330). Everyone else consented, but Vitaly looked unhappy. “I guess if everyone else wants to, but playing is more fun.” Even though it was a great deal for me, I interjected: “Vitaly, this is a game for money. No one is going to give you shit if you want to play it out. It’s your money.” We decided to play it out. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have been so reasonable. I say this in jest, though. Unless I’m in a desperate spot, I never want anyone to make a deal with me unless they are certain that they want to do it.

Pauly was out in fourth and it was John, Vitaly and me. John went out next, even though he still had me slightly outchipped. Vitaly basically made a pot-odds call preflop with ATC and ended up with two live cards, 45o, against John’s two overs. The five hit the river and I was heads-up for the big money.

I was still using push-fold strategy and chipped up a little bit, but Vitaly had a massive stack. We finally saw a flop when I had 95o. The flop was T9x and I pushed. He took a while and called with T4o. I don’t know why he took so long, although I can’t blame him.

Playing with Vitaly was actually a pleasure. You can tell when someone really gets the game. He wasn’t playing like a nit, but also had control over his play. Most importantly, he took my ribbing and nonsense light heartedly. When he wanted to look at my Golden Buddha card cap, I said, “Sure.” As he looked at it, he said, “I wasn’t sure if you’d mind. Some people think its bad luck.” I replied, “I don’t mind,” as I pulled out my Red Elephant card cap, “You are bad luck, but that’s why I brought this.” I love that stupid gimmick shit. It just lightens the mood. He cracked up and said that I had a line for everything. I responded: “Not really. The third time I see you, when I say the exact same lines, you’ll already be bored of it.”

After the game, Wendy came back down and handed me my iPod, complete with sweaty ear buds. Actually, they were quite dry, but how could I not picture them all sweated up. No offense to Wendy, though. I don’t think I would want anyone to use my headphones at the gym, so even though the idea skeeved me out, I hope she takes it as a compliment or at least a sign of our friendship that, aside from joking around, I lent them to her with little protest. I need to pick up new buds anyway as my current set are pretty decrepit from overuse.

I fucking love poker. Plain and simple. It was sweet to finally cash in a tournament at the WSG, as it has been a while (largely because I tend to focus on cash games there). Jamie, once again, ran a great event, as he does several times a week.

I returned home to find wifey Kim already asleep in bed. She looked so peaceful, but I couldn’t help but kiss her on the head as I emptied my pockets in the bedroom. She woke up briefly and then rolled over and went back to bed. I then spent the next two hours trying to come down off of the poker high. It’s the #1 reason why I play the game.

I ought not play tonight, but the Mookie is damn tempting.

Until next time, make mine poker!

*Junk includes testicles.
** I don’t really believe in jinxes or lucky charms, or so I say. But this is coming from a guy who brings two card caps with him in case one of them is unlucky. I can’t help myself.

I hit my head last night. Or, more accurately, my head hit the remote control…hard. Very hard. I’m a klutz.

Here’s the setup. I’m doing whatever, probably working on an Evite for a birthday thing I set up for next week with wifey Kim. When I’m done, I head over to the couch and plop down. My couch is comfortable and was clear of debris, so I didn’t think anything of putting all of my weight into my flop…until I hit my head. As it turned out, the DVD remote was balanced precariously on the top of my couch, so that it faced outward to the TV, with it’s rear against the back wall. When I sat down, the remote jammed right into the base of my skull, about an inch above my spine.

My first reaction was to curse and hold the back of my head as though I were in pain. Wifey Kim asked if I was okay and after I grunted, “I’m fine,” she went back to her business on the computer with narry a look back. I was doubled over, sorta cradling the back of my head trying to assess the damage. I’m used to injuring myself in all sorts of stupid ways. Usually, I just break a toe walking into a coffee table or whatnot. Regardless, when I’m injured, two things tend to happen: (1) I laugh…it’s my odd way of reacting to pain. I’m talking full-on madman delirium laughs here. (2) I walk it off. I just don’t like going to doctors for most things. The body is an amazing thing, and from my experience, 19 times out of 20, it’ll heal itself. Ever take a broken toe to the doctor? Maybe he’ll splint it, but more likely he’ll tell you to take it easy. Ever have a fever that resolved itself in 24 hours without antibiotics? I had an eye infection many moons ago and after debating whether to see the doctor, I finally pulled the trigger…only to be told that I had to keep my eye clean. Thanks, doc. I was planning on rubbing dog shit in my eye, but after following his advice, well, I did nothing and healed!

So, back to me holding my head. The truth was, even though I felt the hit as a hard thud, I wasn’t in that much pain. I don’t know if there are few nerves back there or what, but I decided that I was lucky and okay. Truthfully, if my 200 lb. frame came down with my neck a few inches higher or the remote a few inches lower, I probably could’ve paralyzed myself in one of those freak accidents. But that wasn’t the case. I felt a bit of heat on my skull, and it was a bit sore when I tried to turn my neck, but I attributed it all to a bruise.

Today, the bump is definitely coming out, albeit in a place most people won’t notice it. I can feel tightness back there on my neck and shoulders, but I attribute that once again to the swelling that accompanies bruises. Or, I strained my neck a bit by the force of the blow.

I was a little dizzy last night, but it was very minor and I attributed it more to a psychosematic reaction than to reality. Today, I just feel a bit like I’m in a head fog. It isn’t serious. I just feel tired and sluggish as the day wears on. I was in a meeting with the Bossman and another attorney and found my attention span wanting, but I can’t tell if that’s my head or, well, the subject matter of the conference.

So, does Jordan have a concussion? And if he does have one, what the hell should he do?

I looked up concussion symptoms and I see some borderline indications that I may have been concussed. I called my primary care physician for a consult, but his receptionist told me that all he would do was sent me to the hospital, so I should just go there directly. I hate hospitals, so I did a bit more research.

Once I checked remedies, split into Home Care and Medical, I saw that I was best off toughing it out once again. Home care consisted of icing the head at the bruise/swelling point and addressing any lacerations (I had none). The medical basically said bed rest and liquids. Um, that’s my usual weeknight ritual…

So, what do you think? Hospital or no?

Final thought: Last night, while hitting the head (and in this context, I’m referring to pissing), I thought of a great idea for a post. I thought about writing it down, but then reconsidered. After all, with such a great topic, I’d remember it.

Yeah, but I forgot the topic. So instead you get this post. Stupid concussion.

Until next time, make mine poker!