High On Poker

If you haven’t heard by now, it was recently announced that married NY Governor Elliot Spitzer was involved in a prostitution ring, and as a result of the announcement, Governor Spitzer had no choice but to resign from office. Gov. Spitzer, a horrible hypocrit who actually was involved in prosecutions against prostitution rings, may face severe federal penalties under the appropriately-named Mann Act, which makes it a federal offense to transport a person across state lines for the purpose of prostitution. By participating in this far-reaching, multi-state prostitution ring, Gov. Spitzer revealed that his years of public service taking on corruption in the insurance and financial industries was not an act of reform, but rather a diabolical plan from an evil man as part of his desires of worldwide domination. First, shut down illegal practices on Wall Street that hurts the stock markets and everyday people, then gain the Govenorship, then see a hooker and then WORLD DOMINATION! Thankfully, by uncovering the lurid sexual activities of Gov. Spitzer, crisis has been averted.

And….scene.

Here’s the real deal, people. Elliot Spitzer is a man. He is a man with ambition, as all politicians are. He does what has to be done to get to where he wants to be. But at least he had the right ideas. Unlike many other politicians out there, Spitzer was a reformer who was willing to take on enemies other politicians shied from. Because of this, he won the hearts of New Yorkers, winning in a landslide barely a year ago. Now, 15 months into his first term as governor, his rise to a position where he could continue to serve the community has been thwarted. Why? Because he “participated in a prostitution ring”. Some may read that and think that Gov. Spitzer had organized/funded/found girls for/kidnapped babies to be raised in a high-class hooker farm for the “prostitution ring.” In reality, he got his dick sucked.

I am willing to guess that well over 50% (I would honestly surmise 75% or higher) of male politicians have extramarital affairs. As politicians, they are naturally ambitious, even when it comes to poontang. They tend to travel, as was Spitzer’s case. He was going to Washington, DC, leaving his wife and family in NY, knew about a service that offered discreet girls for copulation and must have thought he was 100% in the clear.

This is not to say that it is “okay” for a married man to “cheat” on his wife with a hooker. It might be okay. We just don’t know. For those moralists, I ask, How do you know that Mrs. Spitzer didn’t know about or was even okay with the Governor getting a little paid-for snatch. She looks upset on TV? Maybe its because she doesn’t want her personal life publicized. Maybe she doesn’t want to have to explain at her country club that, “Oh yes, my husband was banging a whore, but its a reputable whore service and it saves me from having to blow him.” It might not be the way you roll, but it takes all kinds out there.

Some may even say (myself included) that seeing a hooker is actually a lot better than having a mistress. First of all, it is purely about sex and not a relationship, so from a marital standpoint, some people may find it preferable or even, in some instances, acceptable. Second, from a man-in-power standpoint, I rather have my Governor getting some bareback cooch for $4,300, busting his load and calling it a day some 1.35 minutes later, rather than have him cavorting around town trying to pick up some strange. “Get your rocks off and get back to work Mr. Govenor. You having a meeting with the head of the NYS Board of Education in 1 hour.” “No problem, friendly staffer. If the succubus doesn’t arrive in 30 minutes or less, the rim job is free!”

If there is one argument where I can sorta see a point, its the issue of hypocrisy and the need to appear like a law-abiding citizen when placed in a role of power. Yet, even this one falls short. I’ve seen the argument made that Spitzer prosecuted prostitution rings, and therefore, he’s a hypocrit if he does both (prosecutes and prostitutes). I say thee nay! Gov. Spitzer was doing his job when he was prosecuting the prosties. He did not have the right to change the laws; that’s for the legislature. He was merely to prosecute. Was he to say, “Nay, ladies and gentlemen. Though the police have brought this prostitution ring to my attention, I shall deny such prosecution in the name of paid-for-box for all!!” No. He was going to prosecute. It was his job. Every day, I do something that I might not do if not for my job. It doesn’t mean I personally relate to everything I must do. It just means that I know what I have to do in my position.

The bottom line is that this is a bullshit scandal. There is no reason why this should require Gov. Spitzer’s resignation. It is not as though he slept with a young, naive intern…although even that is ok to me. It is not as though he a crusader against prostitution, like Craig was a crusader against homosexuality. The only reason why Gov. Spitzer must resign is that the media has made this into a circus. Nothing would be easy for Spitzer after this, with the national media attention, coupled with the stigma that the media will attach to anything(/anyone) Spitzer does.

It’s all a bunch of smoke and mirrors. And as a result, a much-needed reformer has been brought to his knees.

Until next time, make mine poker!

First, let me thank the people who took the time to comment on the folding AKo hand. I was a bit surprised to see that most players call 800 or so out of their 2100 stack with AKo. I suppose it just goes to show how I tend to think about and play the game in a different manner than most. Usually, I like to think that it’s what makes me different that also makes me so very very awesome, but I have to admit that the commentors have me seriously reconsidering that play. I suppose I was going on a bit of the ole Spidey Sense when I determined that the MP pusher had a pocket pair, leaving me with a coin toss weighted in his favor. I couldn’t fathom many weak Aces, aside from AJ and AQ, but if so many smart players seem to think that those hands and other Aces are more likely than a pocket pair (or at least are likely enough to make a call correct), then its something I have to reconsider. I’m all about self-improvement, so once again, thanks to those who took the time to comment.

Now, let’s get to the pokah! When Jamie sends out Evites to the Wall Street Game, my policy is to reply Yes if there is any chance I can make it, and then, if I can’t make it, find out immediately and change my response. The reason is simple: Jamie’s Evite list is something like 80 players for 11 seats. Usually, if I don’t already know about a scheduling conflict, I’m free and clear. But every once in a while, I sign up for the Evite list, go about my business, and forget that the game ever existed.

Up until Sunday night, I totally forgot about Jamie’s 3/6 HOSE game, a mix of limit Hold’em, Omaha 8 or better (aka Hi/Lo), Stud (Hi) and Stud 8 or better (aka Hi/Lo). Thankfully, an email reminder put me back on track. Still, after a long day at work on Monday (mostly, just suffering through the Monday doldrums, as opposed to anything particularly stressful), I took my timing making it home and over to the Wall Street Game.

Part of my hesitancy was my desire to spend some time with wifey Kim. Part of it was the fact that 23Skidoo was in town and we were short a seat. I figured I could give him at least an hour of poker tomfoolery if I dragged my ass enough.

At home, I made myself a quick sandwich and changed into appropriate poker gear: my cargo pants with plentiful pockets, my original blue (and now tattered) Superman t-shirt, a hoodie, my iPod, sunglasses and my mini-Buddha statue/card cap. I recently purchased a new Buddha card cap from the Chinese gentleman who sets up his folding table of incense mini-statues and bongs outside my apartment building. I had been using a mini green Buddha, holding a sack over his shoulder as my Happy Traveling Buddha for the last couple of months, but since things have been slow, I decided to re-buy my original red and gold sitting Buddha. It was the first Buddha card cap I bought, and it served me well. But like a lot of my poker nicknacks, I lost the damn thing, so $3 was well worth replacing it.

I strolled over to Jamie’s place listening to Adam Carolla’s west coast morning radio show via podcast. As I entered the apartment, I looked around the seemingly-full table. There were some familiar faces like Skidoo, Wendy, the Rooster and Alceste, but there were also some new ones, including big winner Joel and Dustin. Eying the table, I counted out the players only to discover that we were shorter than expected. I squeezed in a seat to the left of the bigstacked Joel (unintentionally, but happily) and to the right of Jamie’s pal Paulie. As I entered, we were in the middle of a round of Omaha 8.

If the mood (and the company) is right, poker can be a lot of fun. Thankfully, everyone was in a mostly lighthearted mood (suckout victims temporarily excluded), and I started gabbing immediately. It started with just joking comments, but by the end of the night, I probably laughed more than I had in weeks, if not months. It was just the right chemistry. I could make my wiseass comments and people would be ready for the comeback or the alley-oop to an even funnier comment.

Laughing is great, and that alone makes playing a +EV experience, but I also have to commend the poker. It isn’t often that I get to play mixed games live, but my track record is pretty good. I tend to play a fairly loose-looking gaming, but that has more to do with how vocal I am in hands, rather than how many hands I actually play. Yesterday, my goal was to be careful with hand selection, while considering the dwindling player count (the first casualty was the Rooster, who probably had some broad(s) waiting for him anyway).

While I don’t remember many specific hands of the night, I did get that sinking suspicion early on that a few people thought I was donking it up. I’ll admit, I do care what people think of me sometimes, and it irked me a tad. The worst part, though, was that the people who seemed to be doubting my play were just wrong. I had a lot of draws by the time I “got lucky”, and if they chose not to see that, it was really on them, not me. That said, I caught myself starting to defend my play until I remembered that it is better for me if they think I’m a donk. That should be second nature for me now, since I cultivate a donk image at times (especially in mixed games), but sometimes ego can get in the way of logic.

Having restained myself, I went back to having fun at the table. One specific hand comes to mind that was particularly enjoyable. I started one hand of Stud8 with A2/4 with two diamonds. It’s a great starting hand for the low, with decent potential for the high. In the first round of betting, it quickly got down to Skidoo and I. Skidoo had a Jack showing, and, I believe, hit a Queen on 4th Street to my 7. It was immediately clear, then that he was playing for the high and I was playing for the low. Skidoo joked about how we were going to chop it so betting was pointless, but I didn’t respond directly. Instead, when he bet, I played along and called, as we joked around. On the next card I locked up my low with a 3. I stopped even looking at Skidoo’s board, which showed a lot of paint (i.e., face cards) and no signs of a low. Skidoo bet out, and this time, knowing full well that I was getting half the pot at the very least (and also knowing that there was no rake), I raised, hoping to land a 5 for a wheel to scoop against his likely 2-pair. Skidoo called and we saw 6th street, where I received a 6 for an even better 6432A low (second nut low behind A2345). I had also developed a diamond flush draw. At this point, Skidoo checked and I decided to continue to build the pot. I had no chance of losing any money and I had a slim chance of rivering my straight or flush to win the whole pot. My river was a Queen of diamonds, and Skidoo check called my bet. It was a rough hand for him, but all I did was exploit my locked-up low.

Skidoo suffered some other suckouts from other players but took it mostly in stride. I suffered a few suckouts too, including a couple of hands where I held the nuts until the very fateful river. Still, overall I was doing just fine.

One other hand sticks out to me. There were probably 5 players in an Omaha8 hand, where I held 2246. The flop came down A78, and I figured I was probably good for the low (the only low that beat me was 23. I believe I bet and got at least two callers, Jamie and Skidoo. The turn was another Ace, making the board A78A. I bet once again, hoping to keep both players in the pot. When you are playing the low, it makes you no money to only have one caller, since you are only getting 1/2 of the pot. If you can get another player to call, though, then you and the high are each going to get 1/2 of the bets placed into the pot by the third player. Even though that 1/2 of a bet ($1.50 in early rounds, $3 in late rounds, since its a 3/6 stucture) is a small amount, the game is all about exploiting for small bets.

To my joy, the river was a 2, giving me 2s full of Aces. The only shortcoming of the card was that it ruined my low. Prior to the rivered 2, I had an 8742A low, with the 2 and 4 as my hole cards. As I’ve already mentioned, I only feared someone holding 23, and since I had two 2s, it was fairly unlikely, especially given the action (or lack thereof). I was in position, I believe, so one of the players would have probably bet out on the flop before me if he/she flopped the nut low with 23XX.

With the rivered 2, all sorts of combinations beat me for the low. Still, my 222AA was probably good for the high, since I doubted someone was slowplaying or check/calling down with a better fullhouse. Once again, my biggest fear in that spot should be A2XX, since that hand would play preflop, and may call down even when they hit trip Aces in order to avoid a plyer with a better trip Ace kicker. But, once that river came, they’d be a fool not to bet out, lest they go for the check raise, and in any event, if someone had the A2, I was willing to lose an additional $12 on the river.

At showdown, Skidoo and I ended up chopping the pot. He held something like A367, for trip Aces and a A2367 low. While we split up the chips, I could tell that he wasn’t happy about that river. My 2-outter (literally a 2, 2 outter, since I needed the 2), cost him the high end of the pot…until I pointed out that prior to the river, I was ahead for the low. While that 2 felt like a godsend, it really was nothing more than a mirror. If almost any other card comes off on that river, I take the low with my 24, and he takes the high with his trip Aces. As it were, I took the high with my rivered full house, and he took the low with his rivered 76-low (lows are sometimes refered to by their two highest cards…in this case, we’d call Skidoo’s low hand, a seventy-six low).

By the time 11pm rolled around, I was up about $100. I decided that it was a good time to cash out and leave, but the pull of poker was too strong, especially since the next game up for bid was Omaha8, one of my favorites. Halfway through the orbit, I was down to $42 profit. It was terrible. I basically chased a super-wrap. The board showed J9x, and I had QT87. Any King, Ten, Queen, Eight, or Seven (16 outs) would’ve given me a straight….but frankly, I’m being a tad disingenuous. The flop also had two spades, so that lost me a bunch of outs. I had at least one spade, so I really had something like 12 outs, but the long and short of it was that nothing came. Down to about $42 in profit, I decided to just fold my way home…until the last hand. I don’t really remember too many specifics other than I had a bunch of low cards, 2468, had a decent low, and drew to an 8-high heart flush. 8-high flushes are often crap in Omaha 8, but with a decent low, I decided to take it to the river, already working out my max losses (which would keep me in the black for the night). To my pleasure, it turned out that my flush was good against Skidoo (who had top two pair or a set) and within an orbit, I went from $100 to $40 back to $100.

When I cashed out, I was up $102. The game felt great. I love playing mixed games. It’s almost like that feeling I got when I first started playing NLHE. It’s the excitement of something new and the fun of learning. It is also the joy of being a teeny step ahead of the pack. I may appear to be a donkey at that table, but I am confident that I have a better feel for the game than most (with some exceptions at Jamie’s table). Most of all, though, I really enjoyed the game because it was fun…and no one took my shtick too seriously.

Until next time, make mine poker!

Yo yo yo! We are one day away from my third bloggoversay. But that post is for another day. Today, I’d rather reflect on the weekend.

My poker itch continues, and I can’t seem to scratch enough. Even so, I am in one of those dry spells. I think I see the end of the tunnel, but since poker has no memory, the truth is, I can only take each day as it comes. Streaks, after all, are meaningless until after the fact. It’s nice to say, “I won 10 tournaments in a row!” but before each of those 10 tournaments, it meant nothing to think, “I have won x tournaments in a row! I’m bound to win this one!” It just doesn’t work that way, even though sometimes I wish there were more meaning to the ups and downs of luck.

But no complaints from your truly. This weekend, I had the pleasure of playing a $20+2, 10k guarantee tournament on Bodog with 422 players. If you are a mathamagician, you’ve already figured out that Bodog had to chip in a 78 player overlay, for $1560 extra into the prize pool. Another fun way to look at it is that for all of the 422 players, FT was tossing in an extra $3.70! Yeah, somehow that doesn’t seem like much, but its more than the $2 fee for the tournament, so Bodog lost cash on the game.

I’ve been playing more and more MTTs lately, generally in the 100-200 player range as a means of keeping poker interesting. I go through phases, and right now, I just want to win something big. Truth be told, I haven’t even played much tourneys of that size (100-200) lately, even though it is my current stated preference. I figure I’ve played maybe 15 tournaments of that size in the last month, if that much. When you consider those numbers compared to some players, the truth is that my online output is minimal. But I still want my lotto ticket, especially since I think I have an edge on the other lotto players. I also love the allure of big money.

Of course, if I won the $2500 first prize for the 10k guaranteed tournament, I would have mentioned it much sooner. As it ended up, I placed in 19th for $70 (without the gurantee, the payout would’ve been $59 and change). I wanted to last until 18th for $110, but I lost a cointoss (AJ v 99), which set me up as the tiny-stack and ushered in my destruction.

Alas, a little bit of scratch is better than none. If nothing else, the small cash will keep me in more tourneys at Bodog, while FT is broke and Stars is underfunded. I may have some money coming my way at FT soon, which will be nice, but as it now stands, I’m happy with Bodog. The interface may not be the best, and I can’t use PokerTracker or AceHUD there, but the players are pretty weak.

As part of Operation Turnaround, I’ve also began dabbling in Bodog’s PLO8 cash tables. All I can say is, the fish are biting.

I leave you with what might be an obvious fold, and might not be. I know that I had to think this one out before laying it down. Here’s the setup:

We are probably 1 hour or more into the Bodog $10k Guarantee, and just chipped up to $2100 after my stack dwindled down due to tight play since the tournament’s start. In the hand that I won, I held AQh, flopped my Ace and kept betting until my opponent folded. In the very next hand, I am dealt AKo in the BB. I haven’t been paying too much attention to the table because I’m multitabling with a 180 SNG on Stars. However, I do know that there has been a lot of action at the table.

In MP, a player pushes all-in for about 860. I fold my AKo UTG (with T2100). So, with minimal facts, is this an easy fold? I guess the real question is, what do you do when you have a nagging suspicion that players are pushing light (blinds were 50/100 at least) and you hold a “drawing” hand like AKo? As we know, I folded because I thought that the pot was not big enough to warrant a call. Even so, I wonder if you all think it is that obvious of a fold. After all, does it make sense to game 800 or so on a coin toss where I believe the chance of me dominating (AJ or AQ) is higher than being dominated (KK or AA)?

Until next time, make mine poker!

From time to time, poker rears its head into realms beyond its usual reach. Kathy Griffin went on a blind date with Michael Matusow on her Bravo show Life on the D-List. Everybody in Baltimore plays poker according to The Wire. Poker’s very own “bad boy” Jean-Robert Bellande was even a castaway on Survivor. Hell, poker has even been played by the thespians on The L-Word, and Marge Simpson even has her own account on TotalPoker.com.

This week, we have a proud new addition to the obscure poker references in pop culture, hailing from the AMC twisted dramedy Breaking Bad. But the most important part about this hand was the television premiere of everyone’s favorite hand, the hammer.

For those of you who do not know, Breaking Bad is about a high school science teacher who decides to cook meth to earn money for his family and treatments when he discovers he has terminal cancer.

In the poker-centric scene, Bryan Cranston’s Walter White is playing a loose game of NLHE in his living room on the coffee table with his wife, handicapped teenage son, sister-in-law, and brother-in-law. The brother-in-law, Hank Shrader, played expertly by Dean Norris, is also a DEA agent and has no idea that Walter is on his way to becoming the America’s Next Top Meth Kingpin.

All players are in the hand when the flop comes down with three hearts. It checks around. The turn is a blank, and it checks around again. The river is an offsuit Ace.

I never expect much when it comes to poker and television shows. In classic TV convenience, after the river, every player except Walt and Hank folded. There was no raise before them. They just folded. I shuddered. When the action go to Walt, he hesitated and then pushed all-in. Hank took his time, trying to determine what to do. Walt, after all, is a seemingly straight-laced guy. His push all-in obviously meant he had the flush, so Hank folded AKo face-up. Walt, to my delight, showed 27s, the Black Hammer! I believe the last line of the scene was, “He had a crazy handful of nothin’.”

Obviously, the scene is a metaphor for the fact that Walt is hiding more from Hank than just the Black Hammer. But I’m just glad that poker and the hammer (albeit a suited form) got its due.

And while we are at it, I found some other obscure TV-poker connections. While watching the Real World/Road Rules Challenge with wifey Kim, I began to wonder about past RW/RR favorite, Michael “The Miz” Mizanin (Real World 10, Return to New York). After appearing on Real World and probably 4 or 5 RW/RR Challenge (not to mention some cheesy TV show along the lines of a battle of the reality TV stars), the Miz appeared on season 4 of WWE’s Tough Enough competition, with the winner getting a contract with the WWE. Well, he lost, but I guess his RW notoriety was enough to get him a spot with the WWE, where he now wrestles under their ECW banner and is co-holder of the WWE tag team championship (Note: I have no idea who the other half of the tag team champs is).

So, why am I regaling you with all things Miz. Well, because not too surprisingly, he plays poker too, and has an interesting poker-related post on his blog. Go take a read if you are interested. There isn’t anything particularly enlightening, other than the fact that we all go through the same poker routine. Miz starts by writing about how he learned the game from his father’s homegame, and then continues on about his experience at Hollywood Park for a celebrity charity tournament. In fact, if you read the thing, other than the mention of celebrities, it could’ve been written by any of us bloggers.

In other weird news, I got some text messages from Matty Ebs about a new gig he got dealing at an underground poker room that only spreads 2/5 and up. That’s higher than I am used to playing, but I am interested in spreading my wings, so I started to ask him about details. That’s when I discovered that the poker club was none other than the Salami Club. According to Ebs, its still open and the 2/5 game plays like 1/2 or 5/10 depending on the time of night and the patrons. In other words, it looks like I’ll be making my return to the Salami Club in the early evenings, hoping to capitalize on the 1/2-like play. No date for my return is set yet, but I’m setting the over/under at 10 days (I’d take the under).

I also coincidentally got an email from Roose today asking about our next AC trip. We are eying the first weekend in May, but the room rates are crazy. I may just have to get another poker room rate from the Trop to make it worthwhile. What wonderful problems to have.

Poker, poker everywhere, and not a donk to dink.

Until next time, make mine poker!

I stumbled across a tricky hand in a 45-person Turbo SNG on Stars.

I was sitting on 1440 chips with blind of 25/50 when I was dealt TT in the Hijack (one seat to the right of the cutoff; two seats to the right of the button). I had been fairly quiet with flurries of activity. When it folded to me, I decided to raise to 250. I had been experimenting with larger bet sizes and in this particular case, I wanted to limit my opponents and their potential holdings.

The SB, Oka, called with 1100 chips. Everyone else folded.

The flop was Ad Ks Jd. I don’t think it could’ve been worse. The SB checks, and I have only 1190 left and my opponent has only 850. The pot was 550. I decided to bet 400.

At the time, my logic for the 400 bet was as follows: My opponent either hates or loves this flop. If he hates it, it’s because he was calling me with an underpair (88, for instance), or he hit a pair but not top pair. If that is the case, I need to bet him off of his hand. If he loves it, he is checking with the expectation that I will continuation bet. In that case, I need to bet low enough that I can fold if he decides to come over the top.

400 felt like the right amount. It was about 80% of the pot size, left me with over 700 with blinds of 25/50 if I had to fold. It was also enough that it would pot-commit my opponent. In the past, I have advocated these types of bets, 50% of your opponent’s stack. The logic is that if you do not want a call, the 50% mark will scare your opponent, but if they call or raise, they have a solid hand (they are willing to put themselves all-in), at which point you can fold for 1/2 the price (as opposed to pushing and hoping that they will fold). I figured the 400 bet was enough to push out a player who had missed the flop entirely or thought that I had an Ace to his lesser pair.

Naturally, if the bet worked, we wouldn’t be discussing it. As it turned out, my opponent flat called, and we saw the turn, Kc. This is another horrible card, mostly because it emboldens the donkey playing a King who may’ve awfukit-called the 400 flop bet.

This time, Oka the SB bet 450, putting himself all-in. I folded.

So, could I have played this hand better? Should I have just check/folded once I saw the AKJ flop? Didn’t I need to at least try to win this pot?

If I had to do it again, I am not quite sure what I would do. While I like my logic behind the 400 bet, I wonder if the 400 was too valuable to me (given my 1190 stack) to risk. Hence, I leave it to you to decide.

Until next time, make mine poker!

I just read this today: Airborne Settles Lawsuit for $23.3 Million. I know it isn’t poker, per se, but I have seen many a poker blog sing the praises of Airborne.

I was always skeptical about a product. Airborne’s original ads explained that Airborne was created by a second-grade teacher, as though that is some sort of argument for its greatness. I suppose the logic goes that a second-grade teacher is surrounded by germs all day long. If she created it and it worked for her, then by golly, it must be a good product.

My logic always worked the other way. Call me old-fashioned, but I like my medicines made by actual doctors and scientists. It’s not just my unhealthy love of science (you sexy bitch, you), but my belief that, well, those people are actually educated in areas that are necessary to make an effective medicine. Now, if the second-grade teacher somehow invented a pill that made amazing macaroni necklaces, I’d be all over it. But a second-grade teacher stumbling upon a cure for the common flu? Puh-lease! Bitch can’t even teach high school science!

The bottom line is that any pill that advertises itself as a cure for the common cold is bullshit, just like any pill proclaiming hair regrowth or rockhard abs is bullshit. Airborne was little more than a vitamin mixed with alkaseltzer. Drop it in some water, watch it fizz and viola, you are healthy as a person with a cold and extra vitamin C!

Yeah, so that’s my public service announcement for today. Tune in next time when we delve into other exciting products like the Roomba robotic vacuum. Not only does the Roomba suck on any area with multiple surfaces, but it also lacks a hose for those late night vacuum sessions (you know what I mean, Woffles).

Until next time, make mine Airborne!

My mind has been racing with poker lately. It’s like some slow-release chasing-losses tilt. All I can think about is the next game, where is it going to be, how can I get in, and how can I play sooner. I have the 2008 negative number in the back of my head, yet I also feel somewhat optimistic. Poker is a bitch, and I’m like a mutt in mating season.

Rawr!

Thinking about poker has got my head all over the place, and a few moments ago, I was reminded of the Financial Game. The Financial game was hosted by Lee in his buddy’s apartment. I’ve played in many homegames and unlike kindergartenners, each one really is it’s own special little snowflake (ooh, burn kindergartenners!).

For instance, Jamie’s Wall Street Game is a very professionally run homegame. Make no doubt, it’s still a homegame, but Jamie has top notch supplies, a clean, easy system, and cooperative players.

The Roose Game is like a hippie concert. People are mulling around, its usually smoky, and you do not want to eat the brown acid. The blinds move faster, so it also makes for a more frenetic game, but the vibe is friendly.

The Lawyer’s Game is like playing poker in an outdated frat house. The players are all busting each other’s balls. Someone is usually drinking scotch. More people are drinking beer. The buy-in is a tad higher and the players a bit more aggressive.

Each one, it’s own special snowflake, and if you have the right attitude, each one a great game to play for fun and profit.

Whenever I play a new homegame tournament, I’m often pretty quiet. Usually, I don’t know the players, so I am merely listening and hanging out. But once the tournament starts, I also don’t ever comment upon rules. I want to gauge how the players react to the environment and the rules or lack thereof in a given homegame can offer a lot of insight into the types of players and their experience levels. I also don’t want to tip off the players that I am playing seriously.

The guy who speaks up is the guy you want to be wary of in the game. He’s paying attention to the action, he knows the rules, and he takes the game seriously. This, of course, assumes that he knows what he is talking about. If he doesn’t, the mere fact that he spoke up tells a lot. If people listen to him, he’s probably an alpha male, or at least someone with influence among the group. If the players reject what he is saying, it still shows that the player who spoke up is paying attention, believes that he knows what he is talking about, and probably feels like he has something to prove, once everyone denied him.

On that note, I am also usually automatically wary of whoever is running or hosting the game. These players obviously are passionate about the game, so until I have determined whether he/she is a student of the game (i.e., a skilled player looking for more opportunities to play and learn), an action junkie, or a social person, I am watching him/her the most.

Aside from the benefits of finding out about individual players, you can learn about the entire homegame population merely by watching what rules they do and do not enforce. This was what really perked my interest at the Financial Game.

The first thing I noticed was that the host splashed the pot. For those uninitiated, when you play live, you should place your bet/raise/call/blinds/antes in front of you. You should not toss them into the pot in the middle. The reason is obvious; by leaving the money separate from the pot, it is easy to see if a player is placing the right amount of chips. It also keeps the action clean; it’s easy to tell who is next to act or how much is needed to call a re-raise if the chips are not tossed into the pot willy-nilly.

If a homegame allows players to splash the pot (or make change from the pot immediately after they act), you know you are playing in a relaxed environment. This may mean that the players are all stooges who do not know the usual rules of casino etiquette. It may mean that the players know the rules but just don’t care because it is a friendly atmosphere. Either way, you know that the players are not taking the game as seriously as they should.

I also noticed that a couple of players put too much money into the pot. In one hand, a player i the $2 BB called a raise to $15 by putting a green $25 chip into the pot and fishing out his $2 BB. That pot was pumped by an extra $10 thanks to his error, so I chose to play my otherwise marginal hand.

One major thing that always sets me off at homegames is table talk. In some games, table talk while a hand is in progress is just not permitted. In most homegames, however, there is a little bit of leway. In some of the most annoying homegames, table talk is outright permitted. I like to play a very verbal game, so that is nice. However, it can be problematic when players talk a bit too much. For instance, a fourth straight card comes in and someone says, “Okay, who has the straight?!” Well, buddy, I might, but even if I don’t, I don’t need you to announce to the table that there is a four-card straight out. Similarly, there are players who see the fourth straight card and grunt, like the whole world just bent them over by dealing the one card they would’ve needed if only they didn’t fold their 82o preflop to a $15 raise and a $60 flop bet.

Even so, if I am not in a hand, I won’t complain about the table talk. I like the information available when other players table talk. At the Financial Game, players were downright discussing hands aloud while play was in progress. Generally, it was the players in the game, but a few times, someone from the rail chimed in with, “Who has the 9!” I mean, come on! Once again, though, I didn’t say anything. First off, I wasn’t in the hand. If I was, I would be willing to tell someone to STFU if they were messing with my hand. But second, if no one else cares, that tells me a lot. These are not serious players. They may think they are, but anyone with significant casino experience knows that table chat from outside players not only an issue of etiquette; it .

The Financial Game played yesterday, but I couldn’t make it. The last time I played there, I lost $41, mostly due to a $600+ pot against bro-in-law Marc, when he cracked my AA and a short-stack’s AA with his KK. This is all to say that while I may’ve left with less money then I came with, I identified a juicy game. Now I just need to get back there.

Until next time, make mine poker!

From time to time, I get press releases sent to me by poker-affiliated PR people who have stumbled across this den of iniquity. Most of the time, I don’t mention them here because, frankly, the press release doesn’t interest me. But I recently heard through a press release that the PokerStars online qualifier to the NBC Heads Up Championship (not to be confused with the Heads-Up Challenge) will be playing Phil Ivey in the first round.

I won’t profess to have a knowledge of professional poker players other than what little information I’ve picked up from the media. But whatever the case, I think you would be hard pressed to argue that Phil Ivey is not one of the best poker players alive, if not the best.

Now, that being said, I imagine that there will be players in the HU Championship that are much less well known, and are probably less experienced and/or skilled, when compared to Ivey.

So the question I pose to you is, if you were the online qualifier going into the HU Championship, would you rather play someone who is considered the best or would you hope for a softer first round?

My personal opinion is that I would rather play a top dog like Ivey. Plain and simple, HU poker can be very luck-dependent. First off, all-in confrontations are more likely, since hand values increase. Second, once all-in, even if Ivey is skilled enough only to get you all-in when he is way ahead, at most he will only be a 80/20 favorite on any given hand (admittedly, he could have better odds in certain situations, like if you call his all-in with 23o and he has AA, but you aren’t that stupid, are you?).

All I am trying to say is that HU poker does have a luck element. If you get hit with the deck, you can run over any opponent. It is true in other poker formats, but less so, since more players means more competition, naturally.

Beyond that, it’s not an easy thing to win a HU tournament. You may be able to luckbox one round, but to go the distance, you will need incredible luck and skill. If that’s the case, then I want my glory immediately. Beating Ivey in the first round as an unknown is a great notch on the ole poker belt. Knocking out Jason Alexander, on the other hand (and yes, he is in the competition), while fun, is a lot less impressive. I’m all for the glory, if you are going to be playing on a national stage against world-renowned players.

So, what say you? Would you rather play against a big-name pro who may be the best in the field, or a lesser-known player with a weaker reputation? Remember, there are no “soft” players in this field.

On a personal note, I’m going through some rough poker times, lately. I’m losing left and right, to the point that I am down about $400 for 2008, well behind my goals for the year. I’m not concerned about my annual goal, since these things are like roller coasters and I’m just in the middle of a dip, but it’s a bit taxing on the psyche. Overall, I’m playing well. I just find that I am coming across the usual pitfalls, with bad beats aplenty. That, and the bad beats have caused me to lose my rhythm, generally speaking.

What does this all mean? Only that it is a bit tough to write and read about poker right now. I don’t expect to play in many of the BBThree games right now with my sad FT bankroll (Bodog and Stars are still decently sized). I want to play more often live, partially because I feel that the lack of live games has hurt my live play. But even that is a stretch.

Poker is a bitch, but she’s a hot bitch and I’m a horndog.

Until next time, make mine poker!