High On Poker

I came out of the closet to two of my co-workers today. We were chatting about general work delirium. I’ve been going back and forth between several files all day, and after a while it can be pretty mind numbing. Yvonne, a secretary/filing clerk mentioned, “So, when are you going to Atlantic City?” suggesting that I need a break. “Next Wednesday!” I’m damn excited.

Monica, a secretary/translator overheard and perked up. “You are going to Atlantic City? What are you doing there?” Here we go. “Um, gamble. Well, not really gamble. I play poker.” “Oh. Are you careful? I know a friend whose son won $200,000 one night and then lost it all.” I gave my usual line, but modified it. My usual line will be in parantheses, “Well, my interest in gambling (my addictive personality) is kept in check by my anal retentiveness.” I then took some opportunities to lightly explain how poker isn’t against the house, so I actually win fairly steadily. “Not that much. I made about $400 last time.” I failed to mention the $350 in losses at table games.

It’s an interesting thing, coming out. I try not to discuss poker in the office. Just today my boss and I were in a meeting with another partner when my boss said, “You only bluff in poker so many times.” I wanted to chime in, “unless the other players are timid fish!” but instead I put on my best poker face and tried to show no interest at all in his analogy. When we had the conversation about taking time off for my vacation, he asked whereto, because I may have to cancel my trip last minute if a trial doesn’t settle before then (as it turns out, I’m now in the clear). I couldn’t lie. At least not convincingly and over the long run. “Just AC with some friends.” That assuaged his concerns about the ability to cancel my trip. I’m just glad he didn’t pry further.

But my question is, why do I feel so shy about discussing my hobby (interest/love/part-time job that pays crap/ambition)? It’s plainly because poker is a vice. It’s like announcing that I’ll be going on vacation to Ireland so I can drink till I puke blood, or that I am going to Amsterdam to smoke mary jane until my lungs give out. It’s also because I don’t want to open my floodgates and profess my pokery love to people who just won’t understand. I’ll tell you one thing: if people do find out about my poker hobby I won’t mind, BUT they will never find out about this here blog. I’m too smart for that.

Do you have similar experiences? Thank god I’m a married man. I’d hate to meet a chick and then have to explain that I enjoy spending hours daily gambling. Do you keep your “hobby” on the down low at the office or among some religious friends (I don’t have any of those either!)?

It’s an odd thing, because I think the poker aspect of my personality has a lot to offer this office and the world at large. It shows my aggressive, competitive nature. It shows some form of ambition and committment. It shows intelligence and skill. This all assumes that I am a winning player (I am, but I play low stakes) and am competent overall about the game. Bottom line is that I feel proud of my poker playing. I just don’t think everyone will see it the same way.

Until then, I’ll keep it in the closet…as much as possible.

My poker attention span may have hit an all new low this weekend. But first, I finally received my bonus from I-PokerTable.com. I figured I owed somewhat of an update. I plan on continuing play there, especially with my recent poker play.

See, lately I’ll hop on a table, take a small lead, and then get antsy and move on. My recent patterns have me start at Razz on FullTilt. I love Razz. I can’t get enough of the freakin game. Even so, after a while I’ll get up and move to the mirco NL tables .10/.20 or .10/.25, $25 Max Buy-in. I’ll play there for a bit and go back to Razz.

I’ve found out some interesting things. First, Razz is a lot easier than some other poker games (I’m looking at your Stud and Stud H/L). Generally speaking, you just play the board cards.

For any newbies, Razz is 7-Card Stud Lo. Basically, you are trying to get the worst hand possible, but straights and flushes don’t count. The best hand is razz is A2345, followed by A2346, and A2356.

With the monkeys playing at FullTilt (1/2 and .50/1 levels), you can play it pretty simple. If your cards beat the other player’s board, bet. If not, check and call if you have a decent draw. Even if you don’t have a decent draw, if your opponent’s next card is pairs their board or is a high card to your low, you can bet out and take it there.

I can not tell you how many times I had a board like Q6/3 (3 showing, Q6 hidden), and called a bet. The other player with xx/2 gets another 2 or a Q and I get a 6, so I have Q6/36 and they have xx/2Q, and suddenly when I bet, they go into the tank. Or, more realistically they call and I can scare them away when their next card is a J and mine is a 7.

Now, I’m not suggesting that this is an overall winning strategy. It’s just that it worked with the monkeys I was playing with. I mean, real banana-loving freaks. It helped that the table was severely shorthanded usually, with only 3 or 4 players.

I tried playing some Stud later in the night with Waffle, but it was to ill effect. I was forcing the action, hoping to make some hands. Plus, I was still in Razz mode, where a well timed bet was all that it took (at FullTilt’s tables, at least). And once you throw in flushes and straights, memorizing the exposed cards becomes a lot more crucial in Stud. That and hand selection is key. One thing I know about stud is that your starting hands better be impressive. Otherwise, you are asking for trouble.

I’m itching to play live. I wanted to play today, but wifey Kim wants to spend some time together after work. My work, that is. Lucky girl has the day off for Martin Luther King, Jr. He was a great man, but I can’t help but feel like his holiday is neglected by most people who just want a day off. Ha! Listen to me, champion of the people! I’m choking on my own self-righteousness.

That is all for today. Have a great Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr. day or as I call it Rev. Dr. M.L.K. Jr. Day, for short.

This post is brought to you by the letter K, the number 9, and the suit heart!

My poker attention span may have hit an all new low this weekend. But first, I finally received my bonus from I-PokerTable.com. I figured I owed somewhat of an update. I plan on continuing play there, especially with my recent poker play.

See, lately I’ll hop on a table, take a small lead, and then get antsy and move on. My recent patterns have me start at Razz on FullTilt. I love Razz. I can’t get enough of the freakin game. Even so, after a while I’ll get up and move to the mirco NL tables .10/.20 or .10/.25, $25 Max Buy-in. I’ll play there for a bit and go back to Razz.

I’ve found out some interesting things. First, Razz is a lot easier than some other poker games (I’m looking at your Stud and Stud H/L). Generally speaking, you just play the board cards.

For any newbies, Razz is 7-Card Stud Lo. Basically, you are trying to get the worst hand possible, but straights and flushes don’t count. The best hand is razz is A2345, followed by A2346, and A2356.

With the monkeys playing at FullTilt (1/2 and .50/1 levels), you can play it pretty simple. If your cards beat the other player’s board, bet. If not, check and call if you have a decent draw. Even if you don’t have a decent draw, if your opponent’s next card is pairs their board or is a high card to your low, you can bet out and take it there.

I can not tell you how many times I had a board like Q6/3 (3 showing, Q6 hidden), and called a bet. The other player with xx/2 gets another 2 or a Q and I get a 6, so I have Q6/36 and they have xx/2Q, and suddenly when I bet, they go into the tank. Or, more realistically they call and I can scare them away when their next card is a J and mine is a 7.

Now, I’m not suggesting that this is an overall winning strategy. It’s just that it worked with the monkeys I was playing with. I mean, real banana-loving freaks. It helped that the table was severely shorthanded usually, with only 3 or 4 players.

I tried playing some Stud later in the night with Waffle, but it was to ill effect. I was forcing the action, hoping to make some hands. Plus, I was still in Razz mode, where a well timed bet was all that it took (at FullTilt’s tables, at least). And once you throw in flushes and straights, memorizing the exposed cards becomes a lot more crucial in Stud. That and hand selection is key. One thing I know about stud is that your starting hands better be impressive. Otherwise, you are asking for trouble.

I’m itching to play live. I wanted to play today, but wifey Kim wants to spend some time together after work. My work, that is. Lucky girl has the day off for Martin Luther King, Jr. He was a great man, but I can’t help but feel like his holiday is neglected by most people who just want a day off. Ha! Listen to me, champion of the people! I’m choking on my own self-righteousness.

That is all for today. Have a great Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr. day or as I call it Rev. Dr. M.L.K. Jr. Day, for short.

This post is brought to you by the letter K, the number 9, and the suit heart!

And hopefully, you will too.

If you recall, I mentioned recently that a website contacted me about putting up a banner. Now, I’m no advertising whore (although maybe I’m a bonus whore), so I told the guy that I’d have to check out the site. I really liked what I saw. But it doesn’t stop there. I decided that I wanted to pass along something to everybody. If the site was willing to do something for readers and bloggers, I was willing to do something (put up the ad) for them.

So, here is the deal. On the right, you’ll see the new picture and link to I-PokerTable.com. I know, I know. Apparently all of the other websites with “poker” in the name got taken. I hear ManAssPoker.com is a Crypto site now.

Once you’ve signed up for the site, keep an eye out at this here blog. Nermin, my unfortunately-named connection at I-PokerTable, has set it up so that we bloggers and readers can enter one of their WPT Satellite tourneys for $6, $10, or $20 and have the enire buy-in refunded back to us after the tourney. Details on the Satellites are HERE.

Now, here is my official review:

This site is great. The software is clean, clear and easy to use. The games offered are Hold’em, Omaha, 7-Stud, and 5-Card Draw. I do not know about Hi/Lo variations. So far, the gameplay has been good and the players have been fairly loose. I’ve doubled my original buy-in of $50 playing Omaha, Limit Hold’Em, NLHE, 7-Stud and 5-Card. Yep, I hit them all, and won on each one. I like variety.

It’s a European-dominated site, so be ready to curse in German. Even better, curse in English. Yep. There is no censorship. Say ‘fuck’ all you want. I sure as fuck did. European players (in my estimation) are often looser, especially in limit games, so have fun with these Old World losers (New World ROCKS!!). The traffic is a bit light, probably because of the time-zone difference. The site has all different currency tables (I stuck with the ole USD), so if you are willing to try playing for Euros or some other silly foreign currency, I’m sure the traffic will be better.

There are no avatars, which to me is a shame. However, unlike Party, Hollywood, and PokerRoom, they don’t have automatic avatars either, where if you sit in seat 6 you are automatically the bald guy (tell me about it!). To me, this is crucial because I find that in sites with auto-avatars, I focus on the avatar and ignore the fact that the same avatar has been four different players, each with different styles. Chat is clear, especially with the pop-up bubbles on the page. It’s a little easier to play and pay attention when you got them bubbles and to know instantly who said what. Smack talk is highly encouraged (by me).

I’m also a huge fan of 5-Card Draw, so the site floats my boat. If anyone ever wants to play 5-CD and sees me online (yahoo IM: highonpokr, leave off the e for +EV) shoot me an IM. I’d love to join.

Now, I have to add some caveats.

1. As for the WPT Satellite Refund, I’m not sure if that includes the fees (i.e., if it is $20+2, we may have to eat the $2).
2. The link on the page doesn’t tell I-PokerTable that you were referred by yours truly, so you will have to email me (Brodybanky@aol.com) with the email account you use when you sign up on I-PokerTable. I, in turn, will tell Nermin and he will make sure you get your refund.
3. I would like to set a pre-determined date and time to swarm the site and fill up one of these Satellites. I am aiming for early February right now, so people have some down-time from the last DADI event.
4. You can play a Satellite whenever YOU want. You don’t have to wait for the swarm. No matter what, you’ll get your refund. You can even play a Sat, get the refund, and then play with us anyway, using your own cash.
5. Nermin stated that if he was going to include the $20 Satellites in the offer, he wanted players to also play on the site aside from the freeroll. Essentially, if we all did a $10, got our refund and booked, the site would be non-plussed. If we, however, do the $20, out of kindness and decency, we should stick around for a bit. I think once players use the site, they’ll want to stick around. Even so, I’m thinking to avoid problems and help out those who can’t layout $20 (remember you get it back), we might have to do the $10. I’ll put it to a vote. Comment, damn you.
6. I don’t work for the site. I don’t get paid per referral. I don’t get any bonuses for referrals. I just think this would be a fun opportunity to play for a WPT spot with a bunch of bloggers. I also don’t want people bitching and moaning to me if they have any sort of problems on the site. So here is my disclaimer: Jordan from HighOnPoker does not in any way guarantee anything. Suck it up, ladies. That said, I don’t anticipate any problems. I just don’t want emails like, “How do I deposit at your site?” or some such customer service nonsense.

Guys, maybe this sounds like a complicated promo, and maybe it is. On top of all of this, the site offers other $$ bonuses. Check out the site for details. Regardless, take a look, and if you like it, give it a go. I thank you and yours for your time.

I’d like to take a moment to discuss a phenomenom I’ve been experiencing for quite some time, but could only identify yesterday. The subject today, boys and girls, is Transitional Tilt, which I define as Tilt that occurs when one transitions from a live game to an online game. But first, some background.

I played at Robbie Hole’s home game last night. The game started shorthanded, Hole, Roose, me and Ilan. We played some .50/1 stud which was a nice change of pace. My one big hand came when Ilan and I were heads-up. I had 82/2 to start. He hit an Ace on the fourth or fifth street and began betting out. I knew he had Aces, but I decided to go forward hoping to two-pair. My next cards were 82/24Q4. On the last card, Ilan accidentally dealt the cards up. I hit my third 4. Rather than re-deal face down, I said it was no big deal and bet out. He folded. The pot was big enough at this point, and since he was dealer, I figured this was the logical solution. If anything, it saved him $1 and secured me the pot without being penalized for his error. After that, the rest of the players came in. It seemed like a good time to change things up and we agreed to a $20 rebuy tournament, with rebuys for the first hour. Upon calculating the cash game results, I was down $0.25. Another player was up $0.50. In the end, we decided to pretend that the cash game never happened, and left our cash game buy-in as the tournament buy-in.

Excuse me for all of the details. I will get to Transitional Tilt. But first, the tournament. The table was set up list this: Seat 1: Me, Seat 2: Ilan, Seat 3: Randy Hole, 4: Rob Hole, 5: Scott, 6: Roose, 7: JR, 8: Peter. Peter was a rookie, and I gave him tips along the way, even telling him at one point that if he was going to call, he better just move all-in. He had 2x the (very high) BB at the time. For newer player without the requisite logic skills (which are by no means standard), this move may not be as obvious to the rest of us. No one complained when I helped. It was that type of game. Scotty particularly is a social player and plainly said so.

The beautiful thing about the tournament is that I didn’t bluff at all until we were three-way. Instead, I just overbet my premium hands and more often than not got paid off. For instance, I had QQ in the BB. Ilan raises from 50 to 100. There re 4 callers. I raise it to 500 (we start with 2000 and it was relatively early). Ilan calls but everyone else folded. The flop was Q23. I bet out 500. He folded. I showed the table. Later, I call a minimum raise (100/200 blinds) with AQ from the SB. The raise came from Roose, so I knew it meant business. I even said, “Min raises make baby jesus cry.” Several people laughed. In total at least four people called the min raise. The flop was QJx. I bet 1000 and took it down.

I later took out Peter and Scotty with my QQ pre-flop. I raised big, Scotty pushed, and Peter, god bless him, called with QJh. I called, and Scotty had me slightly covered in chips. Fortunately, no help came for his AK or Peter’s QJh. Booya.

In the next hand I was dealt AKh so I bet it up the EXACT amount I bet with the QQ, and several people called. The flop was As6s6c. I bet out again and got two callers. The turn was a Xc, giving two flush draws. I raised big again and got a caller AND someone to call all-in. The river was an offsuit blank. I bet out and Ilan, the other caller, folded. Both players were on the club flush draw and I took down the pot.

I was so damn on and I think a lot of the table knew it. I didn’t get Roose’s usual crap about betting with nothing. Damn it, he probably has me read. Scott and Peter clearly had high regards for my game. In fact, in a conversation about the WSOP Circuit Events, Scott, who is already generous with cash, offered to buy a piece of me….without me even asking. Damn that felt good. He flat out said that I take the game seriously and know what I’m doing. Now, Scott isn’t a pro, but it’s nice to see that someone has high regards for my game. This confidence booster does a lot for my mental state AND my game. So, thanks Scott. I look forward to taking you up on your offer.

In the end, it was between JR, me and Ilan. JR is a steely player. I mean, he actually THINKS about his hand and the action at the table, which is uncommon for this homegame. I know that when he bets, he means business, especially early on. When it got down to three, he minimum raised my big blind a couple of times in a row and I folded. Finally with J4 in the BB, I decided to see a card. I called. The flop was J-high. He pushed. I called. He showed AK and I took down the pot.

Ilan and I decided to chop. He had me covered by a little bit, so I took $110 and he took $130. All in all, it was a +$90 night, which brings my 2006 total to +$40 (because of a $ 50 deposit online earlier this month; I’m seriously considering withdrawing $50 online just to offset that deposit).

When I got home, wifey Kim was sleeping on the couch. I sat down to read some blogs, but GCox and TripJax were online, so I decided to chat with them for a bit. In the meanwhile, I openned the new site and played a hand or two of Limit Omaha 8b. Or at least I thought it was 8b. In fact, it was just Omaha hi, so when I hit the nut low and jammed, I was being an uber donkey. After that hand, I closed the poker sites for the night.

Now, before I started playing online, Trip suggested that I play and “donk off my winnings.” He was joking, of course, but the truth was that I knew I’d lose. I was not in the right mood or mode to play online poker, but I still had that residual urge from the home game.

I think when I make the transition, I naturally start on a sort of tilt. I’m not playing my best game at all. I think it may be because I’m playing out of an urge, the urge to continue the live game. And plainly the games are different. I either over-compensate for the difference and play too loose or under compensate and play too timid. No matter what, it’s never a good thing. And, if I play more poker live, like on vacation to Vegas or AC, I need even more downtime from online poker before I can go back with a level head. Hell, I needed 4 days or so when I went to Vegas!

So all of that talk about the game comes down to this question: Do you feel a form of tilt when you switch from live games to online games immediately? I do.

This post is brought to you by the letter A, the number 10, and the suit spade!

Sanji, er, I mean Steve has quit because apparently Sprint is offering better pay. That’s why they say don’t trust the Injuns. But lucky for me, my day has lightened up…or at least I have.

What a day, people! I want to thank everyone blah blah blah DADI blah blah success. But really, thanks. As a reward for your support, I’ll provide you with two stories about people who can go to hell.

The first one happened at the final table last night. Here we were, watching the final table unfold, and suddenly an Observer named LayLow pops in and drops this line. “Hey SirFWalGman, can I borrow $5?” Now, if you know SirF, you know 2 things. One, no one types out that seemingly random semblance of letters that make up his handle. Maybe you’ll get a SirF or a Waffle, but S.i.r.F.W.a.l.G.m.a.n. along with the friggin right capitalization?! Utterly remarkable. The second thing you may know about Waffle is that he currenlty is not on an uber bankroll. I mean, I have no doubt that Waffle is a talent at the table. His 4th place finish tells me that. BUT right now he isn’t rolling in dough, so a friend who is close enough to ask for money (or even a casual reader) would know that.

When I lived in Curry Hill, a block with a whole lotta Indian Restaurants in the city, and a take off on the name Murray Hill, where LI rich kids move so that their parents can pay their rent and they can bitch about paying for their own beer (I know, because I lived there too for a year — thanks Mom and Dad!), there were always hobos outside my building. I was smack dab in between Bellevue Hospital (for crazies) and a Church (aka homeless shelter). Lucky me! It always annoyed me how these hobos would be sitting outside my door drinking beer at 10 am on a Sunday, mostly because I got 2 summonses to appear at court on 2 different occassions for drinking a beer outside. These hobos get away with everything. My point is, I’m a liberal guy, but I loath beggers. They are 99% drug addicts, lunatics or convicts, no matter what the media tells you.

The only thing I hate worse than beggers is e-beggers. At the last tourney, someone else tried the same move, coming into the final table and asking to bum $5. Listen fuckface, if you can afford high-speed Internet, you can afford your own $5. Seeing an opportunity to turn the tables, I jumped in.

“Hey laylow, how much do you need?”
“Just $5.”
“I’ll send it to you…hold on”
“Are you serious, high?”
“Any friend of SirF is a friend of mine!”

Meanwhile, I IMed SirF to make sure he was not his friend. His response, “I don’t think so.” “Good, enjoy the show.”

I waited a minute.

“Lay, did you get it?”
[Wait]
“No. It takes a minute.”
“I sent it already.”
“Let me ask, when will you pay me back. I mean if you bust, I want you to pay me back some time.”
“I’ll pay you tonight.”
“Oh, I’ll get it to you by Friday if I bust.”
[Wait]
“Did you get it?”
Me again: “You aren’t scamming me are you. It says it sent.”
“Are you messing with me?” LayLow is catching on.
“No. Dude, you are scamming me. I sent the money. Stars says it sent. I’ll email them if I have to.”
[WAIT]
Him: “You had me going. You are messing with me.”
“Get the hell out of here you f’n begger. We don’t want your type around here. We don’t take kindly to strangers. Now git!”

Fucktard. It’s my way of protecting the next table from the begger and making his EV go down. You can’t mass beg if you are too busy focusing on my mischeivous ass. Just your friendly neighborhood HighOnPoker.

So, here’s the second story, about my morning at Court. This is an extension to a situation I dealt with a while back. I appeared at court for a case involving a client of ours who was sexually molested. The child was/is a minor. I won’t say anything else about specifics about the case or client because of attorney-client confidentiality.

Now, here is the thing. Last time I appeared for this case, I realized that I knew the City’s attorney. Turns out that we were against each other in a inter-school competition during lawschool. I whooped her ass good with my legal prowess. I can recall that she was a real firecracker (read: uppity bitch), but I figured I’d make my opponent my friend. We were shooting the shit when I mentioned that I had switched from insurance defense to plaintiffs work. She replied, “Oh, you switched to the dark side.” I didn’t say it, but I was thinking something along the lines of, “What did you say, bitch? In case you didn’t realize it, dark side must mean helping a defenseless child that was abused on your clients’ watch!” Dark side indeed.

When I arrived today, I sat with the other defense counsel. He made a similar comment about us plaintiff lawyers. I had enough. I turned toward him and said, “The funny thing is, my client is an abused child, and yet I get the most shit about being a plaintiff attorney on this case than in any of my other cases, where clients walk into glass doors or some other stupid accident.”

I was amped. We were called in to see the judge, and to my surprise I was walking into an ambush by that bitch and the parents of the accused perpetrator. The judge was cool though. I have to give him that. After everything was done, the bitch is writing up the order and is chatting with the judge about the case, making her arguments. Now, this is not the place for such a thing to be done, but maybe I can get some info. I moved closer. “What did you say? I missed that.” She looked up at me from her seat with disdain. “Look, we aren’t going to settle this. We are willing to take this all the way to trial. This isn’t a clear-cut case.” You see, this bitch is the type that is so worried about looking weak and/or fucking up that she is all aggression. I used my legal tai kwan do. “If we weren’t ready to take this to trial, we would have never made the claim. You should know that without me having to announce it aloud to the world. And if you thought this was a clearcut case, you would have already paid me, so I don’t see what this speech is about.” The judge nodded. I got the hell out of there quick as I could. I scored my points behind enemy lines. This was all prepped in the cab ride over, when we were already an hour and 15 minutes late because of an error at the office. It wasn’t even my case, but shit rolls downhill.

My lower back is killing me. That is the result of all of this nonsense. My adrenaline gets up. I make my argument. I think clearly and act with precision and ingenuity. I leave. My adrenaline is gone. I’m a cripple. I love it. I hate it.

But most of all, I hate e-beggers and insecure loudmouth bitches. What a waste of a post. Enjoy. I’ll be at Robbie Hole’s playing slo-mo poker if anyone needs me.

I’m extremely busy at work, so I’m sorry to say that I won’t be able to post today. For that reason, today’s post will be written by Sanji, my out-sourced Indian blogger:

Hello everyone. I am Steve from…Detroit. I am very glad to be helping you. Last night was a wonderful occassion. Forty-seven persons had arrived to play in the DADI Special Omalympics. I thank Vishnu, I mean Jesus, for this explosive turnout.

Above all, it was a very social occassion. Bloggers and readers alike enjoyed the witty banter of some of the greatest minds in Pot Limit Omaha H/L and Bloggerdom. The final table was a wonderful group. First and foremost, Mr. Jordan placed 9th, for a paltry sum, but a fine showing at his own tournament. His suckout strategy worked on two occassions where he rivered a full house after being all-in with two pair against a made straight and flush. Truly he is a lucky Untouchable.

Boobie Lover (did I get this link right?) and Veneno placed 8th and 7th, respectively. Very nice run to both of these fine competitors. The Poker Bus was unlike those in my home town of….Detroit, and ran well into 6th place. Placing in fifth, fourth and third were DuggleBogey, SirFWalGman and Felicia Lee. I haven’t seen a set of names that big since Rajkumar Satoshi directed Amitabh Bachchan and Akshay Kumar!

The final match lasted all of one hand when Jestocot defeated ZeemJr! What an exciting day!

Now everyone hold onto your turban for this exciting new. Team Tricky DADI defeated both the SuMo Shark and the Drizz All Stars, where SirFWalGMan subbed in for Trauma Poker! What a doozee! Mr. Jordan asks for his money immediately before he curses you all!

Keep an eye out for an upcoming $10+1 HORSE tournament on FullTilt, courtesy of ThisIsNotApril. It is to be held on Saturday January 21, at 7pm EST. I will not attend, for I will be mourning the first anniversary of the death of Parveen Babi. What a hotee! Mr. Jordan will try to attend, but he is often sinning on weekends.

The time is here for me to say goodbye. I leave you with this popular movie line with poker words put into it, just like Mr. Jordan does.

“Mohabbat mein aisa anjaam ayga poker socha na tha roigi tu aur check-raise dil ko ayga khabhi socha na tha donkey!”

I’m giddy for tonight. Now all I have to do is get through this busy day at work. These last three days have felt more like 10, but the DADI Special Omalympics has given me something to look forward to. That and the Robbie Hole home game on Thursday. I’m shocked to say that it’ll be my first live game of the new year.

I’d like to take some time to thank some people. First off, a big thanks to my teammates GCox and TripJax for taking a chance with our underdog team. In that vein, I’d also like to thank them for helping DADI come about. Trip jumped on board when the idea was merely to get enough people to play a blogger SNG. GCox’s presence and outreach is always welcome. And while I’m at it, thank you to the whole SNG Challenge crew who inspired this cracked-out experiment in mass poker bloggery goodness.

Thank you to all of the blogs that have pimped the Special Omalympics. That prestige list includes AlCantHang, Sir Waffles, Poker4Peace (SlimeFace), Chipper, ResIpsaPoker, LittleAcornMan, SlagPile (Jestocot), PokerFundInvestments (FairNBalancd) and anyone else who I undoubtedly forgot and feel terribly guilty about as we speak.

Thank you for the people who were willing to take on the Last Longer Bets. No surprise, but its a solid crowd. Team SuMo Shark (Surflexus, Mowenumdown and Sharkness) and The Drizz All-Stars (Drizz, Trauma and Daddy) will give the Trick DADIs a run for our money.

The Trick DADIs are officially out of funding, so no other Last Longer Bets will be accepted. However, I know Veneno and PeaceCorn wanted to create an all-estrogen team to take us down. Well, girls, I’m still open individually, and if Waffle is interested, maybe he and I can team up against you broads in an inter-gender championship match. Waffle has yet to be confirmed.

So many links, so little time. Let me also thank a slew of people who signed up for VegasPokerPro through my link. This new group of Bonus Whores includes G-g-g- G-Unit, GreenDrag00n, iibarciaii, and mmaryja1. If any of you need any advice on clearing those promos Uber fast, and which ones to go to first, let me know. I also wouldn’t mind hearing any opinions on VPP or the sites you signed up for. If you haven’t signed up via VPP yet, you are fooling yourselves. You can clear their RoyalVegas promo in 2 weeks TOPS! For your trouble, you get the usual cash bonus from RoyalVegas and either 2 free poker books/DVDs (including classics like Rounders), $50 gift cards to BestBuy, Amazon or eBay, PokerTracker, a poker table-top, or a set of chips for FREE. You don’t even need to pay shipping. I’ve personally earned $400 in gift cards, PokerTracker, a $100 gift certificate, and a poker table top through VPP and a similar promotion. If you have any questions, VPP Dave will be playing in the Special Omalympics tonight. I want to thank him too for joining us and for being so supportive to this site and the blogger community. VPP, we thank you.

All this whoring makes me feel dirty. Too bad my new years resolution was to stop showering. Now THAT takes self control!

It’s 11:40pm and barely anyone is online. Good thing I had Waffles keeping me company. He was two-tabling some SNGs. I was playing a turbo SNG on Stars. Lemme tell you, we were up to 100/200 blinds with 25 ante and there were still 7 players in. I was in 3rd place AND STILL a short stack. The deathblow came when my AJh went against AJs…he hit his flush. The next hand I was all in as the BB with AJo against KK. Criminy! At least I feel like I played well. I played uber tight and my one losing hand was pretty unreal. I mean, it happens, but I can’t fault myself for that play. I pushed all-in UTG in 3rd place knowing that everyone was short and people would push in with Ax or even KJ. I had to make a move somewhere. Hmmph.

I played a little on PokerRoom earlier tonight with Robbie Hole. Poor Hole has a Mac, so he’s relegated to PR. He checked out Full Tilt, but he couldn’t find out how to deposit with Insta-Cash. I just smiled and nodded.

I reviewed my numbers for last year, and discovered….nothing. I mean, I had a great November and December. I guess that is something, since meanwhile I was losing my stack online. For all new readers, I only consider an online win a REAL win (for my ledger) when I withdraw. So, as far as I’m concerned, I only have $50 or so online in Real money. Any time I deposit real money to an online site, I consider it a loss immediately.

For the year so far, I’m down $50. Haha! That’s because of an online deposit. No live poker yet. But that’ll change on Thursday when I play at Robbie Hole’s house of poker and odd smelling smoke. It’s the slowest game around, but it’s a good time nonetheless.

I can’t wait to get back to Genoa, the illegal poker room. But that doesn’t look likely until next week.

Pimp that DADI people. We have 17 players, so we are okay either way, but I’d like to see some more folks playing if possible. If you are on Yahoo IM look me up during the event tomorrow. HighOnPokr. Leave off the last E for +EV!

That is all. Time for bed.